Staten Island is Actually... Cool?

New York, I have a secret for all of you. And you have to promise not to laugh at me (too much), alright?

My secret?

I... I love Staten Island.

Yes, yes, I know, NYC's "forgotten borough" is often ignored or ridiculed. Most New Yorkers' experience with it, I've found, is that they rode the ferry over once, then turned around and got right back on it and rode back to Manhattan, spending only a few minutes on Staten Island itself. I was one of those New Yorkers for awhile, myself. I get it, I do. Staten Island is a pain to get to, and you need to be comfortable with buses if you go there.

But it's so so worth it, you guys. Staten Island, I am publicly apologising for all the shit I once gave you, for you have shown me so many delightful hidden treasures. If you ever have a day to kill (and don't mind buses or can access a car for a day) I highly recommend all my New York friends check out at least one of these incredible little-visited gems...

A Gift Guide in the Loose Sense of the Term

Iiiiiiit's the season of holidays! Hanukkah! (Which technically ended already but shhh goyim don't know that.) Kwanzaa! Christmas! Winter Solstice! Yule! Saturnalia! Festivus! Probably like ten others! And you know what that means?

Is the answer 'Stock photos'?

It means that in today's capitalist hellscape of a world that we are all forced to live in, there's a lot of pressure to get the perfect gift!

This gift guide is... probably not going to help find the perfect gift for anyone. (But if it does, hey, you're welcome!) What I do hope is that this will at least help you think outside the generic gift box that most other 'gift guides' I've seen fall into...

A Very Heathen Hanukkah

You GUYS. I gotta say I am touched.

I recently found out (just last night at a Lore Chat with the New York City Heathens group) that this blog has been getting outside attention due to an older (in retrospect rather word-vomity) blog post on this very blog. Throw. Back. In fact, some of my irl friends within the Troth mentioned having read it without realising I was the one who wrote it, which is... certainly interesting. (Whoever shared me with the Troth, thank you and hello from a fellow Lokean and Troth member.)

Anyway, did you know that I also consider myself Jewish? And that Hanukkah ended recently?

By night 8 the menorah was significantly messier with wax drippings, so have a photo from night 1

"But wait," say those of you who know little to nothing about Judaism and the fact that Jewish Atheism is actually a very common thing, "that makes no sense. How can you be Lokean and also celebrate a Jewish holiday?"

Fair warning, those of you who are very attached to the idea of the One True God who created everything? You're gonna wanna skip this post. If you choose to click through and comment in a way that is offensive to either Jews or Heathens, I will delete your comment and refuse to engage with you. You were warned.

Disenfranchised Grief - How Do I Mourn Someone I Never Got to Meet?

November (and NaNoWriMo) is over now so I can finally post about this.

I stopped blogging rather abruptly in October, and I apologise sincerely for that. I've been struggling to figure out just how to post about what happened. As you may recall from recent-ish posts, I was very excited by the news that my sister was pregnant, due to give birth in late September/early October. She was going to have a baby boy. She was going to name him Greyson.

Then, on October 16th, I was on my way to work. I was sitting on the Q-Train, which was stuck at the station for like 15 minutes and not moving, which was some grade A MTA bullshit but that's neither here nor there right now. My mother called and I remember thinking, "it's early for her right now" so I picked up, wondering what the deal was.

"Greyson was stillborn," she said. No hello. No how are you. No are you on your way to work. Just three terrible words.

Greyson was stillborn.

You know how in movies when a character gets a terrible piece of news and the camera zooms in and turns at an angle to represent their shock? This felt like that. I was so stunned. It felt like I'd been punched in the gut, and I was reeling as my brain tried to wrap itself around what it had just heard.

I didn't understand how it could be.

I still went to work that day. I was so in shock that I couldn't think of what else to do. The news didn't really hit me until about 10 AM. And then, abruptly, I could feel the sobs tearing their way up my throat and I had to run - physically run - to the employee break room to let them out. I do count myself lucky that my coworkers are understanding, and that one of them had a sister go through the same horrible thing so she was extremely understanding.

But still, it just didn't seem fair. I was bitter. I was angry. I would see people pushing babies on the streets, or read news articles about child abuse and child neglect, and think 'why do they all get to be parents? Why do they all get to keep their babies and my sister - who wanted nothing more than motherhood, who always wanted children as far back as I can remember - have to lose her son?'

I couldn't understand why. I still don't understand why. Maybe there isn't a reason why. But the human brain doesn't like that answer and still searches.

When someone like a parent or grandparent dies, it's tragic. It sucks. I am not trying to belittle that. But when you have lived a life with someone and they go, you have the memories of that life to help you through your grief.

With Greyson we don't have that. We have nothing but my poor sister - I am the older sister; I was  supposed to protect her - bemoaning that her body has become a tomb. We don't know who Greyson would have been. We don't know how to even begin to handle this kind of grief. Are we mourning the person or the possibilities? Or both?

I'm still trying to take it day by day. For the most part I'm still living my life - I did NaNoWriMo, Sarah and I celebrated the first night of Hanukkah last night, things are going well with my girlfriend - but every time I think about it too hard I still start to cry. It's been difficult to get used to. I had so wanted to be an aunt, to buy him cute little presents and sing to him with Sarah.

I don't know how to properly mourn that in a society that tells me what mourning is and doesn't leave room for an aunt who lost a nephew. Of course my sister and her boyfriend have more right to this grief than I do, I'm not saying they don't - but it's just indescribable.

If I have seemed off to anyone who knows me in real life lately, I am sorry. I'm  still reeling.

How do I properly mourn Greyson if I have no idea who he was going to be?

-Nym

A Quick Update

For those of you wondering where I have been,

In October there was a sudden and unexpected death in my family which I am... still struggling to figure out how to deal with.

I need some time to myself.

This blog will update again in December.

Thank you all for understanding.

-Nym

Sukkot in the Twilight Zone

The title of this post is a bit facetious but this year, my Sukkot has certainly been a lot stranger and more dreamlike than in previous years. I used to celebrate it with Jewish friends back in California, so I'm no stranger to eating in the Sukkah and the overall joyful atmosphere of this holiday. But last night's celebration truly takes the cake.

First off, there's a well known anecdote about Jewish holidays about how almost every one of them can be described with "they tried to kill us, we survived, let's eat!" Sukkot isn't quite like that. It's a lot more joyous. The Torah itself commands Jews to be happy. There is feasting and singing and dancing and you get to eat outside in a little hut called a sukkah that you decorate yourself and it's a lot of fun. And you get to shake the lulav, made up of four species of plant - the citron, which has taste and fragrance; the date palm, which has taste but no fragrance; the myrtle, which has fragrance but no taste; and the willow, which has neither taste nor fragrance.

Like many other things within Judaism, there is rich symbolism to this. To some Jews, taste represents Torah and knowledge, whereas smell represents mitzvahs. Thus, the willow represents the Jew who has no knowledge of the Torah and who does not perform mitzvahs. The myrtle represents the Jew who performs mitzvahs and tries to be good but does not know a lot about Torah. The date palm represents the Jew who knows the Torah and Talmud and all the Jewish history backwards and forwards, but who may not perform any mitzvahs. And the citron represents the Jew who is knowledgeable and performs mitzvahs.

And on Sukkot, all four species are shaken together because - in theory - it is a time when all Jews are supposed to come together and celebrate, despite our differences. And last night really embodied that aspect of Sukkot for me more than I've ever experienced.

Because last night I celebrated with the ultra-Orthodox Hasidic Jews.

A Journey to World War One [WITH INTERVIEWS!]

I'm gonna skip doing a flouncy intro and just cut right to the chase - last weekend was the annual "Camp Doughboy" WWI event on Governor's Island.

Though a lot of my friends were gonna be there (many of which longtime readers of this blog will probably recognise), I actually didn't think I was gonna be able to make it this year. But I guess the gods were on my side, because one odd circumstance after another led to my Saturday being unusually free (I usually work until 6 on Saturdays!), so I hopped on the ferry to Governor's Island.

And boy am I glad I did.

World War One often gets brushed under the rug in American history, in favour of its flashy sequel. But the stakes were equally high, if not higher, and it definitely deserves a hell of a lot more lip service than it gets! I learned so much from this event! And I wanted to take the opportunity to share with you all some of what I learned.

While wikipedia will lead you to a lot of resources about the circumstances and outcomes of World War One (or "The Great War" as it was known back then) I decided to focus on something a little different - the stories that are rarely told of people who are rarely recognised for their role in the war.

Below the cut are interviews describing the roles of Native Americans, female doctors, and Hollywood starlets in the war effort. I sincerely hope you all learn something you didn't know before in reading them. Enjoy!

I'M GONNA BE AN AUNT!

I didn't post this in my last entry because I didn't want anyone ruining the surprise for my sister, who didn't know I was coming back to California - but last weekend I attended my sister's baby shower!

I'M GONNA BE AN AUNTIE!!!

She's having a bouncy baby boy (by which I mean the baby will be amab; idk how it's gonna end up identifying as an adult) and I could not be more excited. Honestly, I think I'm more excited to be an aunt than I would be to be a parent - I get to do all the fun parts and then if the baby shits or cries I can hand it back to my sister. Also I cannot wait until this kid is old enough to visit me in NYC, so I can take them places like Coney Island, the Children's Museum of Manhattan, and the Sea Glass Carousel!

And you just know that as soon as he is born I will be posting baby photos!

Congratulations to my beautiful sister. May she and her baby have nothing but happiness together.

-Nym-

On FlameCon, the Intergalactic Exchange Program, and Meeting Someone New

I know, I know, absolute word salad of a title. But this last weekend, a friend and I attended FlameCon - New York City's only (that I know of) LGBT+ comic/movie/TV/video game/overall geekery convention. And for a smaller sized two-day convention, a lot happened, including...

• My friend Lily and I went as Amilyn Holdo from "Star Wars" and Starfleet Academy Saavik from "Star Trek" (based on the Starfleet Academy uniforms from the Kelvin timeline) and made many references to an "Intergalactic Exchange Program" (also Amilyn and Saavik are both lesbians and you cannot convince me otherwise.)
• I met my favourite webcomic artist of all time, and she was so nice to me! I was a little (okay, a LOT) nervous because I've met other webcomic artists in the past who were not so warm and cordial. But Megan Rose Gedris, I'm pleased to report, was genuinely kind and inspiring. Plus the glitter in her updo looked SO GOOD.
• I made tentative plans to maaaaaaybe attend a Star Trek convention in the near future. More on that (if it ends up happening) in the future.
• I met someone new...

They are not pictured in this photo, I just wanted to show off our intergalactic exchange program.

If I know my audience (and I do know some of you irl), it's that last point that a lot of you will inevitably be curious about.

There's honestly not much to tell (yet) but here's the main breakdown of how we met...

At the con itself, there was a lesbian/sapphic meetup, which of course Amilyn and Saavik (and the sapphic cosplayers portraying them - aka us) had to go check out. And in that room full of women and women-aligned folk who loved women and other women-aligned folk, the conversation soon turned to lesbians' seeming inability to ask women out or even flirt with them.

And then I remembered the "Useless Lesbian" cards Sarah made me a few months back:

This is the front. The back has my photo and a little blurb about me

I figured that if anyone would appreciate these cards, it would be this group of people, so of course I handed out the few I happened to have in the bottom of my bag. Much to my surprise, though, far from just getting laughs (though I got plenty of those), I actually was approached by someone and asked for my phone number. This was surprising for many reasons, not least of which that I was in full Vulcan make-up, with the upturned eyebrows and the pointed ears and everything.

But I gave it, and we began texting back and forth. And then we went on our first date a few nights ago. And it... it went really well! Though I hesitate to put a label on this just yet, and though we're really just taking it kind of slow for now, I really like them. I think we're really compatible.

And I'm genuinely surprised that it worked out the way it did. I haven't had much luck when actively seeking out dates, either online or out in places like Stonewall. I'm still working through a plethora of self esteem issues that make me hesitate to talk to people the way I wish I could. A couple months ago I had a minor flirtation with someone but it never extended past that.

But this is different, somehow. It just feels a lot more natural. And it just kind of... happened, without me really looking that hard for it.

I'm really really looking forward to seeing where this goes. Our second date is next weekend (I wish it could be sooner but I have a lot to take care of this weekend, but at least we text every evening) and so far it's going great. I like them a lot. I think meeting them was the best thing that happened at FlameCon.

Con season isn't over yet! I will be attending NYCC as Dr McCoy, and possibly Northeast Trek Con in Albany (not sure yet if I wanna do that as Saavik or McCoy)

Dif-tor heh smusma! (That's "Live Long and Prosper" in Vulcan!)

-Nym

Oh, Canada!

So I've been more or less fairly silent on the blog, and for that I am sorry, but I've been so busy planning the vacation Sarah and I took for her birthday! I'm pretty proud of myself as I planned this entire vacation all by myself, a major step in adulting if I do say so myself. We went to Niagara Falls, Canada!

We did a pretty good mix of activities, too - from the nature related (taking a boat up to the falls, and taking a nature walk downriver), to touristy (look I know Clifton Hill is cheesy but we were on vacation and we love kitsch), to living like the real Canadians (by which I mean we ate a lot of Tim Horton's)

It was a short trip, yes - but it was a much-needed fun one!

Sorry I've Been So Quiet Lately!

I know, I know, it has been over a month since my last update. July has just been an absolute whirlwind, and August looks like it's going to be just as crazy - especially since between my NYC ID offering me free admission to museums and my library card now getting me into many more museums, I've been filling up my free days with museum visits! (Since returning from a California trip in early July I've visited the American Museum of Natural History, the New-York Historical Society for their Norman Rockwell exhibit, the 9-11 Memorial Museum because SARAH WORKS THERE NOW, the Bronx Zoo, the New York Aquarium, the National Museum of the American Indian, and the Brooklyn Museum. This Friday I also plan to hit up Scandinavia House and the Morgan Museum. I have not had to pay a penny for any of this. Life is good.)

(Side note - if any of you would like a blog post highlighting any of these visits PLEASE let me know in the comments and I will be happy to oblige.)

In less than 2 weeks, Sarah and I will be going on vacation to Niagara Falls in Canada. When I return, I expect to be a lot more active on this blog once more, as I do wanna share some of our experiences there with all of you lovely readers.

Until then,
Nym

How To Care For Your Selkie Significant Other

Fun fact about me: my favourite mythical creature is the selkie - the Irish humanoid who can shed off the skin of a seal or sea lion to transform into a beautiful human - but if you startle them, they'll turn back into a pinniped and retreat to the sea!

Irish folktales are full of tragic selkie tales where they lose their sealskin and are trapped on land by a cruel fisherman, or where they fall in love with a human but the human cannot accept that for a selkie the sea comes first. But I don't think a selkie tale always has to be tragic. I think that if we really were to find and care for a selkie, it may take work and understanding (as does ANY relationship) but it can be romantic and beautiful.

These "tips" were adapted from a journal entry I made in my private journal about a fictional selkie character Sarah and I were talking about on Monday.

A pile of pinnipeds? Or selkies in disguise?

Tips for taking care of your Selkie S.O.:

• Run frequent baths for your selkie with bath bombs and cruelty-free bath products (with plastic-free packaging if possible) to keep both sets of skin hydrated and soft and clean.
• Make a commitment to cut down on your plastic waste as much as possibly can, as human-produced plastic waste kills the fish selkies need to eat and destroys their homes.
• Never ever ever hide your selkie's seal skin - not even as a joke!
• If your selkie hears a seal, sea lion, or even a dog barking, sometimes they'll bark back. As cute as this may be, resist the urge to tease them for it. They can be sensitive.
• The selkie-mermaid rivalry is real. Always take the selkies' side of it.
• Collect pretty shells you find to decorate the bedroom you share. Your selkie will appreciate your effort to make them feel less homesick
• Selkies' natural diet is mostly fish. One of their favourite human foods is sushi - the fish is raw, like they're used to, but they don't get strange looks for eating it in public. (Selkies are naturally cautious and tend to avoid drawing unnecessary attention to themselves.)
• Some selkies really like ice cream, but most of them are lactose intolerant. Be sure to have lots of Lactaid on hand to avoid tummyaches and smelly seal farts.
• Selkie society is very big on music and song. Even if you're not a strong singer, they appreciate the effort when you try. Alternately, make them a playlist. You can include sea shanties, Irish folk music, and whalesongs if you like, but they'll try listening to any type of music at least once.
• It's well documented that seals love to cuddle, and this goes for selkies as well. Cuddle your selkie often and they will consider themselves yours.
• Lastly, but definitely most importantly, accept that every now and then your selkie needs to return to the ocean for awhile. It doesn't mean they don't love you; it's just something they have to do. Wait patiently and soon enough they will return to you.

Hopefully with these tips you can make the most of your relationship with such a beautiful creature.

-Nym

How To Cut Down on Plastics in Three Parts

As some of you already know, I work at Ellis Island on certain Mondays every month. Well I am very pleased that as of yesterday, plastic bags have officially been eliminated from Ellis Island's Museum Store!

A lot of people don't know this about me, but as of the past few months this cause has become very important to me. We only have one planet and if we don't all do our part, it may not be livable by the time our children's children are born.

And plastic, though it does have its uses (in the medical field for example), is becoming a big problem. The accumulation of plastic in our oceans is fatal to marine animals such as whales, dolphins, seals, and sea turtles, who can get entangled in plastic materials and even mistake it for food. Plastic also takes a very long time to degrade, so we should be a lot more careful than we are with it. Because this problem shows no sign of slowing - in fact, scientists expect plastic waste entering the ocean will increase by a considerable amount by 2025 if we don't all do our parts to change our habits, and soon.

Look, I don't mean to get preachy. Really, I don't. But I like oceans. I like ocean animals and I like our planet and I want to keep all these things around. This is important so we shouldn't be selfish about it - if you can help, even just a little bit, why wouldn't you want to? I know most of the blame lies with big corporations, but every tiny gesture we makes helps just a little.

You guys, just because "Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home" was the greatest of all "Star Trek" movies does not mean that I want to head towards the future where whales have gone extinct because humans are assholes. So let's do our part in the following ways:

1. Make the switch to reusable products

This is such an easy, simple switch, and it actually helps to save money in the long run. By switching to reusable water bottles, bringing cloth totes to the grocery store, and refusing plastic straws in restaurants/at home (use a reusable metal straw if you absolutely must have a straw - they are fantastic for cold drinks), you help cut down on a lot of plastic waste. Slow down and eat in to avoid takeaway containers and plastic cutlery. And if you absolutely must use something plastic? Reuse or recycle it whenever possible!

Also, you can purchase ocean-friendly plasticless products. For example - and I'm not married to this company so feel free to do your own research and shop elsewhere - but LUSH has a lot of fantastic plastic-free products that smell delicious and work wonderfully. I've made the switch to their solid shampoo bars (which last much longer than liquid shampoo - I use this one, myself) and their "naked" shower gels, both of which cut way down on my plastic waste. And if you like to sparkle, all of LUSH's glitter is plastic-free and biodegradable.

I swear that I'm not sponsored or anything, I just really really love their products...

2. Make a commitment to sustainability

Perhaps this is just a broader interpretation of point 1, but the point still stands. There are a number of ways we can be more sustainable, not just with plastic, but with everything! For example, if you eat seafood (as a vegetarian, I do not), do your best to make sure you're eating sustainable seafood instead of contributing to the species extinctions that things like plastic waste help cause. I've included a link to the Monterey Bay Aquarium's (a beloved California institution) guide to doing so, but there are a number of such guides on the web. Also? Pick up after yourself when you go to the beach, as quite a bit of marine debris gets its start as beach litter. (Seriously, guys, don't litter - what are you, a Captain Planet villain?)

When in doubt, try to remember the 7 R's of Sustainability: Refuse (if offered plastic bags or straws when out and about, say no), Reduce (cut down on how much you're using), Reuse (use products again if they're still good instead of just throwing it out), Repair (if it's broken try to fix it before buying another one), Rot (if something is biodegradable or made of natural materials, compost it instead of throwing it out to go to a landfill), Recycle (duh), and Rethink (if you can't do any of the above then do you really need that product???)

3. Be the one who influences change 

Spread the word about your commitment to sustainability! It may feel like you can't possibly make a difference, but if every single one of us talked to just one or two people, and they all talked to just one or two people, well, who knows what could happen?

Research conservation policies of public officials before you vote, or contact your local representatives about measures that cities like San Francisco have taken such as banning plastic bags and plastic straws. Speak up about your concerns if you spot a threatened species on a restaurant menu, and take part in initiatives that fight for the cause!

This is gonna sound absolutely cheesy, but we can do this if we work together. Yes, it feels like an uphill battle - because it absolutely is one - but it's not impossible.

#SaveTheWhales
-Nym

A Very Gay Sunday

Pride Month has come to NYC and I don't know about any of you guys, but I intend to enjoy it to the fullest. I'm still not used to having events where I can celebrate being completely, unabashedly myself, but it's thoroughly freeing to be able to do so!

This past Sunday, the 10th, I attended not one, but two LGBT+ events to kick off my Pride Month. In the afternoon, I was on a private tour of the Lesbian Herstory Archives, which I had never been to before. And in the evening I met up with Sarah, and we attended a trivia competition with the Gay Geeks of New York at the LGBT Centre in Chelsea. (We didn't win but we made friends and had a lot of fun.)

And that's not all! I'm attending numerous LGBT events later this month as well, and if you're in the NYC area I strongly encourage you join me there!

It's JUNE

And you know what that means?

IT'S PRIDE MONTH BITCHES.

I've got some exciting things coming up this month! I am going to a couple LGBT events in honour of Pride - not to the giant parade itself (I don't like crowds and the blatant capitalism of the event makes me a bit uncomfortable tbh) but there are a couple lesbian events I'm attending, and Sarah and I are also thinking of hosting a pride potluck picnic in Prospect Park. (How's that for alliteration?)

I'm also thinking of confessing my feelings to the girl I like. Even if she doesn't return them, even if chances are that we only will ever be friends, part of me still wants to tell her just in case I do have a chance. (I don't think that I do though...) Knowing me, though, I honestly bet that I'm gonna chicken out... She's probably not looking for a relationship right now anyway...

At the end of the month, I will be returning to California for a week for my high school reunion, my 28th birthday (which I'm gonna spend in San Francisco), and my GRE! That's gonna be EXCITING!

And, well, that's what's going on in my life lately. So look forward to lots of great entries this summer - about pride, about my California adventures, about what happens if by some miracle I don't chicken out in confessing to this girl...

And happy pride to all my LGBT+ friends!
-Nym

Fleet Week at the U.S.S. Intrepid

I readily admit to having very mixed feelings about the military. (And about the state of this country in general, but that's another post for another day, really.) In general, I consider myself very anti-war and very anti-US-sticking-its-nose-where-it-doesn't-belong. Like the idealistic hippies of the 60s, I wish we as a planet could "give peace a chance", and like the cynics of later decades, I'm frankly disgusted with the blatant capitalism of it all.

At the same time, I fully understand that for many Americans, their only chance to go to college is to join the military, and I can't fault them for that. I recognise that I am privileged for getting to go to university on my parents' dime, and if I hadn't had that, this may have well been my path too. I did actually consider it. Briefly. Very briefly. (And then I realised that, as a nonbinary lesbian, it prooooobably wouldn't have been quite safe for me.)

And despite it all... I love Fleet Week.

I can't help it! It makes me nostalgic - my friend Ashley and I actually went to Fleet Week in San Francisco quite a few times!

Photo by Ashley, SF Fleet Week 2011

So when I heard Fleet Week was coming to New York City, I knew I wanted to go out and see some sailors. Don't judge me.

There were multiple ports all over the city where navy ships were docked, so I asked Sarah what she would like to do. Since my toe is currently broken, I knew I wouldn't be able to go to more than one, so when Sarah suggested we visit the real U.S.S. Enterprise (that's right, the "Star Trek" ship's name has been used for MULTIPLE U.S. ships) I looked it up.

It turns out that NASA's space shuttle, the Enterprise, resides at the U.S.S. Intrepid, where Fleet Week celebrations were going on! So our goal was set and we set out for our sunny Memorial Day weekend adventure!

Of course, it later turned out she'd meant this Enterprise, the one the "Star Trek" ship was named after, not the one named after it. Turns out that ship is actually docked in Norfolk Virginia... oops... but that error aside it was still a fun adventure of a day!

Egg House

What, exactly, is the Egg House?

How does one even begin to describe the Egg House? Well according to its website, it's "a place where we can come together and celebrate our dreams & aspirations and see what great things New York City has in store."

A more accurate but less fun description? Egg House is an instagram-friendly pop-up art project made by recent grads of NYC art schools such as Pratt Institute, NYU, and the School of Visual Arts. It's kind of like the Museum of Ice Cream in San Francisco (that's right, California friends, I've seen all your insta and snapchat posts!) except... egg themed.

More specifically, Egg House has a charming story about a little egg named Ellis.

A Time Traveler's Dinner Party

It was never one of my more popular posts, but this is honestly one of my favourite posts on the blog. However, I never dreamed when I came up with the concept that I would one day host my own real life historical dinner party for some of my history-loving friends. Granted, Alexander Hamilton and Sarah Winchester did not show up - but I did invite friends who I met through my time giving tours at Mr. Hamilton's and Mrs. Winchester's homes. So I guess that kind of counts, doesn't it?

I called it the Time Travelers' Dinner Party, as my friends and I are all as close to time travelers as it gets in NYC, what with all our historically-inspired jobs, events, reenactments, and more. I curated a menu inspired by historic food and drinks from the ancient era all the way up to the Edwardian era, encouraged my guests to wear clothing inspired by historic eras and figures, played appropriate music, and dressed like a Viking to play hostess!

Thank you so much Lindsey for this elegant photo!

I think I pulled it off pretty well, if I do say so myself. Read on for the deets if you're curious about just how time travelers have a dinner party...

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Ancient and Medieval Ghost Stories

FROM THE ARCHIVES note: This post is from an older blog of mine that has since been taken down from the internet. It is presented here with minimal editing because I still find it interesting enough to share. The original post was published on 18 August 2014.

I have long been fascinated with the idea of ghosts. Even in my teenage years, when I called myself an atheist (agnostic may have been a better description for my belief system at the time), I was a firm believer in ghosts, even if I never could wrap my head around the science of them. I'm pretty sure my house is haunted, but the spirits in the house (my old cat, a little girl, and a couple others) are pretty benevolent. I live down the street from the Bernal Ranch, one of two locations in San Jose that is certified as being haunted - the other being, of course, the Winchester Mystery House. (Also apparently being certified haunted is a thing?)

But do you ever notice that most ghost stories you hear about never seem to go back any further than the Renaissance? You hear about the ghosts of Anne Boleyn and Marie Antoinette and all those Civil War soldiers and murder victims from the Victorian era all the way up until now. But human history is way older than all of that. Millions and millions of souls have died after all - surely, there must be older ghosts. Did they all move on? Why don't we ever hear about them?

The thing is, if you do a little research, you totally can learn about them. For example, the Ancient Romans divided ghosts into 3 different categories - those crazy scoundrels loved orginising things into categories:

Lares - good spirits who were willing to help the living
Lemures - truly evil spirits who physically harmed the living
Manes - largely indifferent but generally good(ish) spirits

I am going to share with you three stories about ghosts, all from before the year 1000 CE. You're welcome.

Party Like It's 1789

Do you know those mornings after you were out half the night and you're exhausted and slightly dehydrated but you had so much fun that you're too happy to care about the exhaustion and dehydration?

Yeah, it's one of those mornings for me. Because last night was the first annual George Washington Inaugural Ball, a commemorative fancy fundraising event thrown by my friend Lindsey (of Lindsey Loves History) who is one of the smartest and most hardworking women that I have the pleasure of calling my friend. (Of course, all my friends are smart and talented and perfect in their own way but Lindsey def deserves a special shoutout here.)

It was a magical night filled with food and drink (for those who wished to partake) and fancy gowns (of both the modern and 18th century variety) and dancing and harpsichord music. And I am so lucky I have the friends I have and that I was able to attend.

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Viking Heroes for the Modern Age (Hiccup vs Ragnar)

FROM THE ARCHIVES note: This post is from an older blog of mine that has since been taken down from the internet. It is presented here with minimal editing because I still find it interesting enough to share. The original post was published on 8 June 2014.

I've been meaning to do this post for months, to be honest. Last semester my big 20-page research paper for one of my classes was entitled "From Hávamál to Horned Helmets: An Examination of Vikings in Popular Culture". In the paper, I analysed how the role of Vikings has changed in pop culture, from the Wagnar operas of the Victorian age all the way up to History Channel's "Vikings" TV series. I'd like to share the whole paper, but for fear of plagiarism after I worked so hard on it for months, I cannot do so.

However, with the newest installment in the "How to Train Your Dragon" franchise coming out in less than a week (I AM SO EXCITE), I absolutely can reference that paper to create a blog entry that talks a bit about the modern role of Vikings in our movies and TV shows.

You see, it used to be in movies that Vikings were largely considered villains. Horned barbarians, hell-bent on murder and pillage, something straight out of an 8th-century monk's worst nightmare. But recently that has started to change - Viking enthusiasts have fought back against this unfair stereotype of what were really a highly technologically advanced society. And with this backlash, we have a new type of Viking character in modern popular culture. The Viking hero is cunning, brave, often strong in an unconventional way. And I feel this new Viking hero has two great examples on the air right now:

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Let's Talk About Aliens and Fairies

FROM THE ARCHIVES note: This post is from an older blog of mine that has since been taken down from the internet. It is presented here with minimal editing because I still find it interesting enough to share. The original post was published on 4 January 2014.

Picture this: You're lying in your bed. It's dark, and you have been sleeping. Suddenly, though, you wake up. It's dark and you try to sit up - but you can't. You feel numb, sedated even! You look around with your eyes and see blurry humanoid - but not quite human, they're off somehow - figures staring down at you. You try to struggle, but you can't move. Something is very very wrong. You black out. It's only later when you wake up in your bed and wonder if it was just a strange nightmare - until you look down and notice marks on your body as if you had been operated on or probed!

Now what does this sound like?

The Starfleet Academy Experience

I have a confession and an apology to make, all.

For years, I turned up my nose at "Star Trek", believing myself too good for something so "nerdy", even as I regularly nerded out over the Viking age and  the American Revolution. (Hypocritical, I know.)

I didn't feel, at the time, like I was being judgmental. I could respect what a historically diverse show it was without watching it, and I never once looked down on Sarah for being a fan of the show. I just didn't think it was for me. After all, many years ago another good friend had tried for years to get me to watch "Star Wars", and when I finally sat down and did it, I was bored and underwhelmed. And "Star Trek", as a TV series, was much longer - I wasn't about to sit through hours of being bored and underwhelmed.

Turns out I was being unfairly judgmental and I am sorry. Because I finally sat down and started watching "Star Trek: The Original Series" and I am completely and utterly in love with it. Obsessed, even! How could I have let myself miss out on this joy for so many years? And why, because I was afraid it was too nerdy for me? How blind I was!

Even though it came into my life later than it should have, I'm grateful for it now. My confession to you all? I was an asshole, I am sorry for it, and I am now, one week later, a thoroughly devoted Trekkie.

Live long and prosper, bitches

Go ahead and roast me for it. I deserve it for what a jerk I was about it.

But the point is I love it now. I am learning (slower than most adults) to like the things I like without caring so much about what other people might think of me for it.

And this past Sunday, to thank Sarah for introducing me to it, I decided to treat her to a certain Trek-themed museum exhibit before it closes next month. We journeyed back into New Jersey to head to the Liberty Science Centre's Starfleet Academy Experience. Basically this exhibit, in between props and costumes from all the Star Trek series, uses interactive tests and games (including the infamous Kobayashi Maru test) and at the end of it all, you're placed into a different section of Starfleet. Kinda like a sci-fi version of being sorted into your Hogwarts house.

FROM THE ARCHIVES: A Short History of Evolutionary Theory

FROM THE ARCHIVES note: This post is from an older blog of mine that has since been taken down from the internet. It is presented here with minimal editing because I still find it interesting enough to share. The original post was published on 2 February 2014.

Before I begin, a note/disclaimer: This post is going to discuss the concept of Evolution. If that offends you, don't read it. In fact, don't read any of my blog. Just don't talk to me. I have no patience for creationist pseudoscience bullshit, I really don't. My entire career is based on the overwhelming evidence that evolution exists and if you can't handle that, you are weak and need to step out of my life. Door's over there.


Still with me? Good. Then let's begin.

Hey guys, remember when I met Charles Darwin?

Fellow anthropologists, I can feel your jealousy.

I majorly geeked out when I met that Darwin re-enactor, and got to talk evolutionary theory with both him and a fellow guest of the event, who happened to have a passion for the stuff. Evolution, when taught by someone who knows their stuff and has a passion for it, can be extremely fun to learn about, and it is my own personal belief that we all should be learning about it, fun or not!

But where did the theory come from? Okay, obviously it's science, it came from Darwin and others observing what they saw around them and coming to logical conclusions based on the biological evidence and the fossil record. Still, is it possible that maybe it wasn't that obvious? Why did it take us until the Victorian era to come to a conclusion that seems so overwhelmingly obvious now?

Friends, I am going to tell you how the idea of Evolution came about.

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Cosmopolitan Constantinople

FROM THE ARCHIVES note: This post is from an older blog of mine that has since been taken down from the internet. It is presented here with minimal editing because I still find it interesting enough to share. The original post was published on 8 Feb, 2014.

Those who have been following me awhile, both here and on my tumblr blog, are well aware that I love the city of San Francisco, infamous for being very liberal and very very multicultural. (Also super smelly in many areas, but we'll ignore that for now.)

Oh I wanna be hoooo-oooome in my city...

San Francisco has a special reputation, but a lot of it is shared by other big cities. Los Angeles and New York City here in the States come to mind, and of course you have London, Paris, etc.! Modern cities have this... this thing about them that I just love! I like being able to walk from Chinatown to Little Italy to get a cannoli to wash down my dim sum. I like being able to walk through a street with vendors selling colourful fabrics from India and Mexico. I like being able to say "Hey... you know what I haven't eaten in a while? Ethiopian food." and getting on a bus to go get some.

Big cities, at least in the west, seem to have become, over the years, increasingly multicultural. (Possibly elsewhere as well but having never been to Tokyo, Hong Kong, New Dehli, etc., I really could not say.) But how far does this phenomenon go back? To the 60s? To the Victorian era?

Try a thousand years.

I mentioned recently on twitter that the idea of multiculturalism being common in metropolitan areas is not at all a new one, name dropping Alexandria and Constantinople. Rome, too, was pretty mixed in its heyday. Here, have a map of Ancient Alexandria:

With a Jewish quarter, temples to Greek, Egyptian, AND Roman gods, and even Christian catacombs and churches, Alexandria was pretty well mixed.

Alexandria, however, is not a city I have studied in great detail. You know which one I have studied a lot? Constantinople. (Though my focus is in Northern European archaeology, I am particularly interested in the presence of the Norse in Byzantine-era Constantinople, so... I have read so much about Constantinople, you guys.) So we're gonna talk about that one.

How to Time Travel to the 18th Century Right Here in NYC!

I know I post a lot about my occasional forays into the 18th Century, and I'm sure you're all quite jealous ;) Well guess what, all? If you're going to be in New York City next month, you will all have the opportunity to join me and my lovely friends - including the extremely wonderful Lindsey of Lindsey Loves History, and the talented Eliza of Silk and Sass  - at an 18th Century Themed event for for princesses and presidents alike!

Tickets for the first annual George Washington Inaugural Ball are now available on the event's website, and it promises to be an absolutely wonderful evening. Held at the historic 19th Century Federal Hall building (which itself was built on the site of the building where Washington was sworn in as our first president - did you know NYC used to be this nation's capitol?), the event will feature period food and drink, musical performance, and both historic-style and modern-style dancing. The dress code is either black tie attire OR your 18th Century best.

Lindsey sure as heck knows how to plan a fun event, and if you can join us there, I highly encourage it. (Those who are reading this blog from California or elsewhere in the world I am sorry - but you will be able to live vicariously through me as I do plan to blog about the event if possible!)

On Sunday, on the steps of Federal Hall, a group of us (Lindsey and Eliza included, as well as the Hearts of Oak - a historical reenactment group that Eliza and her fiancee are part of) held an 18th century flash mob on the steps of Federal Hall to raise awareness for the event. I certainly hope our flash mob was successful in raising awareness - I know I told more than a few curious onlookers why we were all dressed up in our finery and frills!

(Regretfully, I do not actually own any 18th Century period clothing. Luckily, in my college years, I was heavily involved in lolita fashion, and I figured this was the next best thing to at least look a little Georgian!)

Photo by the talented James Prochnik; dress by Japanese lolita brand Innocent World

Read on for a summary (and lots of photos) of last Sundays event, and then get your butt over to the ball's website and get your tickets before they all run out!

Saying Goodbye to Momo

This morning, my cat back home in California, Momo, passed away of what was likely kidney failure.


She was a unique soul. We used to call her the "nurse cat" because whenever anyone in the house was sick or sad, she would go to their side and lay with them and let them cuddle her or cry into her soft fur or whatever they needed.

She would sit like a person, and was the type of cat that when you spoke to her, she would meow (loudly and, if I'm being honest, somewhat obnoxiously) to "talk back". She had the loudest purr I had ever heard.

She was a large, round, lazy ball of orange fur and love. I got to say good bye to her on FaceTime last night (thank the gods for modern technology), and she is going to be cremated just like her sister was.

I don't have it in me to write much more than that for now, I am afraid.

Rest in peace, Momo. I love you.
-Nym

Searching for Anne of Green Gables

I've been thinking a lot of Anne of Green Gables lately. The series has not only been my favourite for most of my life (since I was 9! Almost 19 years!), but something I come back to again and again, re-reading the books with a sense of coming home. If fernweh is real, then I feel it for L.M. Montgomery's Avonlea and have felt it for as long as I could remember. I return to Anne Shirley and Green Gables again and again, as a safe haven when my modern life and my depression become too much for me. (The author of the series, L.M. Montgomery, also suffered from depression, and sadly not even Anne's sunny nature could keep her from ultimately taking her own life.)

Lately, though, the series has been on my mind for more reasons than that. Of course, as my last entry mentioned, Sarah and I are planning a vacation to Canada, home of Anne Shirley and L.M. Montgomery, and if there are any Green Gables souvenirs available on our trip, you can bet your ass I'll be begging Sarah to let us take it home to our Brooklyn home. So that's reason number one.

Reason number two is that I've been reading the first and last books in the series at the same time in the last few weeks. The first book, I've been reading out loud, one or two chapters a night, to Sarah, who had never read the series before but wanted to know more about it as she performed Diana's song from one of the musicals based on the book for a cabaret recently. Sadly, no one filmed her singing it so here, have a video of one of the other songs she performed that day because I love Sarah so much and she's so talented:

The last book, The Blythes Are Quoted, is the only one in the series I hadn't read before. It was the last book Montgomery ever wrote - she turned in the manuscript to her publisher very shortly before her suicide - but wasn't published in full until 2009. I've wanted to read it since then, but it's incredibly difficult to find a hard copy on the book for anything under $200. Luckily, a coworker of mine gave me her old Nook after her husband got her a Kindle, and it turns out an electronic copy of the book goes for a whopping thirteen dollars, something even I can afford. So I bought it, downloaded it, and devoured it, savouring every word of Montgomery's swan song and the last book in which Anne Shirley Blythe appears, following my dear literary kindred spirit all the way up into World War II.

And yet I can see why it wasn't published in the forties when it was written. It doesn't feel like the other Anne books. It's undoubtedly Montgomery's prose, with her flowery descriptions and subtle humour, but it's much darker than the sunny and comfortable optimism that's a trademark of the first few books. It has a ton of darker themes that really reflect just how bad Montgomery's mental state had gotten by the second world war - themes of adultery, illegitimacy, despair, misogyny, revenge, bitterness, hatred, aging, death, and even murder. It's fascinating.

While I still love the first three Anne books best, as reading them feels the most like a homecoming for my soul, the completionist in me is glad I finally got to read the final book.

In diving so much back into Anne's world, both in sharing the first book with Sarah (which has been fascinating as it's like seeing it for the first time through someone else's eyes) and finally getting to read the last book, it's giving me such a longing to literally visit Anne's world. I don't just mean reading the books or watching the various movies and TV shows that have been made based on the books. I want to walk past the Violet Vale and the Lake of Shining Waters and take tea with Anne Shirley and Diana Barry and my beloved Sarah in Avonlea itself! I am impatient and don't want to wait for our Canada trip - I want to find Anne and her world right here in New York!

Tea service at Chat Noir, Rockville Centre

 But is such a thing possible?

Quick and Dirty Vegetarian Poutine

I... have been a terrible blogger lately, haven't I?

It's not that I haven't been doing anything. I've done quite a lot since my last blog entry. My mom even came to visit, and we did lots of fun things, such as seeing Billy Joel in concert and going to the restaurants of three chefs who have been judges on "Chopped". I've also gone to multiple museums with my friends, the Museum Girls, from the Louis Armstrong House Museum to the Whitney.

I've just had a lot on my mind lately, and it makes it difficult to sit down and focus on drafting a blog entry. I know that's no excuse, of course, but it's the truth. I just couldn't make myself sit down and type anything out. I've been too busy planning.

Planning what, exactly? Wellll... I suppose I can reveal the secret.

Sarah and I are planning a vacation to Canada!

It won't be for awhile (we need to get through tax season and save up first) but I'm very excited - we both are. And one of the things we're most excited for is trying Canada's most disgusting delicacy - poutine! In fact, I was so excited to try this Canadian favourite, I didn't want to wait the months and months until our vacation to roll around. So, of course, I decided I'd have to make it myself.

Unhealthy? Yes. Delicious? OH yes.

Now, I am not gonna call this a recipe. If you want a meatless poutine recipe where you make the fries and the gravy yourself, there are tons and tons of actual recipes on the internet. No, this is more like a... tutorial. For those of us who are lazy and don't want to spend the time cooking, or for those of us who are doing this after a long day at work and don't have the time to spend doing all that from scratch.

You will need...

• French fries (You can either use the freezer variety that you bake in the oven, or if you're super lazy, you can order fries from a local restaurant on Grubhub or Doordash or something)
• Cheese curds, or if you can't find curds, then fresh mozzarella cheese broken up into small chunks
• Campbell's mushroom gravy in a can
• Vinegar (I used white vinegar because I keep a lot of it around for cleaning, but apple cider vinegar would likely work as well)

Here's what you do:

1. If you're using freezer fries, bake them in the oven to your desired degree of crispiness. I would recommend making them crispy because you don't want them getting too soggy under all the gravy.

2. Mix a splash of vinegar into the gravy and heat it, either on the stove or in the microwave, depending on how lazy you're feeling. The vinegar is optional, but after much experimenting, I've found that it adds some much-needed acidity to the heavy mushroom gravy, which makes the dish taste better and feel less heavy in my sensitive stomach.

3. Assemble it on a plate! Fries first, then cheese, then gravy. OPTIONAL - plate your poutine on a red and white plate, the colours of the Canadian flag, and listen to "Canadian, Please" while you chow down!

And that's it! It's quick, it's easy, and it's delicious!

I hope you enjoy, and I promise I'll try my best to do a more substantial blog entry soon!
-Nym

"Winchester" Movie Review!

So I saw "Winchester" last night.

Now I wouldn't normally do movie reviews. I am not a movie critic. I have no professional background in film analysis.

But this is "Winchester" for crying out loud. It's a movie based on the House that I still love with all my heart, on the woman who I've long considered one of my heroes. Of course I was going to go see it. I had to. So I went with my friend and fellow former Winchester tour guide, Hannah, who you may remember as one of the former tour guides who visited Mrs. Winchester's grave in New Haven with me.

And sure, artistic liberties were taken - they always are when historical events are put to film - but did it live up to the Winchester name? Was it any good? Was it worth the $17.50 I spent on a movie ticket?

The Forgotten Hamilton

It's pretty common knowledge that Alexander Hamilton, despite all of his numerous accomplishments, considered his large family one of his most important legacies of all. He considered himself a family man and, fittingly, had an absolute army of children. There were 8 biological children in all, though the oldest and the youngest never got to meet one another:

1. Philip (born 1782)
2. Angelica (1784)
3. Alexander Jr. (1786)
4. James Alexander (1788)
5. John Church (1792)
6. William Stephen (1797)
7. Eliza (1799)
8. Philip (1802)

Now, it seems that the further we go down this list of children, the less people know about them. Everyone has heard of the first Philip, of course - he's the one who died in a duel. Angelica got her own entry on this blog, and even Alexander Jr. sometimes gets remembered for the fun piece of trivia that he represented Eliza Jumel as her divorce lawyer when she divorced Aaron Burr.  Some people know the name of child #5, John Church Hamilton (named not after John Laurens, but after Angelica Schuyler Church's husband) as the man who wrote the first biography of Alexander Hamilton, and who commissioned what a friend of mine calls "the weirdly sexy Hamilton statue in Central Park".

But what about child #8, Philip the second? It seems people only remember him as a footnote - even my tours at the Grange only mention him as the baby named after the son who died in a duel. But the guy did lead a life beyond just being a baby. 

This is what he looked like as an adult

So let's learn a little bit about Philip Hamilton number two - or, as his family called him, "Little Phil".

I'VE MOVED TO BROOKLYN!

So I have to make a confession, you guys.

I'm sure you all have noticed that I haven't exactly been the most active on this blog lately... (No, it's not just because I've been obsessively playing "Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp" since November.) The truth is, the last month or so has been one of turmoil and upheaval, for a bevy of personal reasons that I don't really feel comfortable sharing publicly. But this all ended up leading to one thing, a big piece of news that I have to share with all of you...

SARAH AND I HAVE MOVED TO BROOKLYN.

We're on the border of Flatbush and Prospect Lefferts Gardens

It hasn't exactly been the smoothest adjustment, as moving is never easy, especially in the middle of winter, but we did it and I am so proud of us.

And you know what? As my months-long depressive spell starts to lift, I'm coming to find that... I actually quite like Brooklyn.